Introspection !!

In a bay of loneliness,
reminiscing the past,
brooding over mistakes,
solicitous about the future.

As I gaze at those white ceilings,
reeling under influence of thoughts,
I realise solitude is a medicine
a medicine for instant peace
and eternal happiness to a wounded soul

But what it offers is not what we take
Eternal may be wat it offers
ephemeral is what we take
there is a longing,a longing for eternal solitude

but why?
why me?

May be I have an answer
An answer that remains concealed
An answer I hate
An answer I fail to accept

zealously jealous over what I am not
Fail to see the outside world
A world, jealous over me

do i get over it?
but how ?
like this !